THE FACT OF THE MATTER
BY PAUL HOPKINS
In the autumn of 1986, my father’s youngest sister, Toni, and her partner, Eric, flew to Indonesia, where Eric filed for a ‘no-contest’ divorce from his wife. He and the love of his life then flew on to New York and married in City Hall, Toni’s brother and sister flying in from LA to bear witness.
Earlier that year, the Government, led by Fine Gael, proposed a constitutional amendment to remove the absolute ban on divorce. The proposal was met with overriding opposition from conservative groups, religious institutions, and a significant portion of the public. The Catholic Church, then still a dominant force in Irish society, actively campaigned against the amendment.
For decades, the ban on divorce meant that couples in failing or abusive marriages had no legal recourse to separate permanently. Many resorted to legal separations or annulments, while others sought divorces abroad. However, these foreign divorces were most often not recognised in Ireland, leading to complex legal disputes and difficulties for those seeking to remarry or secure property and financial settlements.
The result of the 26 June referendum was a decisive rejection, with 63.5% voting against the amendment, the outcome showing that Irish society was not ready to embrace divorce as part of family law.
By the early 1990s, attitudes had begun to shift, driven by changing social values, increased urbanisation, and greater international influence. The election of Mary Robinson as Ireland’s first female President in 1990 was symbolic of this shift towards a more progressive Ireland.
In 1995, the Government introduced the 15th Amendment, proposing to allow divorce under strict conditions: spouses had to have lived apart for at least four out of the previous five years; there had to be no reasonable prospect of reconciliation; and proper provision had to be made for spouses and children.
A national referendum was held in November. The result was one of the closest in Irish history, with 50.28% in favour and 49.72% against. The margin of victory was just over 9,000 votes, reflecting deep societal divisions on the issue.
Following the referendum, the Family Law (Divorce) Act 1996 was enacted.
Though a landmark moment in Irish legal history, the stringent requirements made the process lengthy and often difficult. The mandatory four-year separation period prolonged emotional and financial uncertainty for those seeking to end their marriage.
The primary aim of the 38th Amendment in 2019 was to reduce the mandatory separation period, allowing for a less burdensome process.
In May of that year, the referendum saw public support for change overwhelming. A massive 82.07% supported the amendment, showing a significant shift in attitudes since 1995 and an acceptance of divorce as a ‘practical necessity’ in modern Irish society.
The legal evolution of divorce in Ireland mirrored a broader shift in societal attitudes. Several factors contributed to this attitudinal shift. Among them, increased secularisation, where the influence of the Catholic Church on social policy has declined dramatically, particularly following a series of high-profile scandals. Greater gender equality sees women today having more financial independence and career opportunities, making it easier for them to leave unhappy or abusive marriages.
Most pertinently, there is now a rise in couples just living together, with society no longer batting an eyelid, and the acceptance of single-parent families and same-sex marriages. Thankfully – and it’s been a long and often painful journey since the grey days of home rule being Rome rule – as a grown-up society we now recognise the realities of modern relationships and prioritise the well-being of individuals and families. A lot done but, arguably, a lot more to do – domestic violence, neglected children, misogyny, the glass ceiling.
The mother of my three wonderful children and I divorced about 12 years ago. The breakdown came for many reasons, but I like to think that in some ways it was a good divorce. I wrote up our divorce agreement, which she found more than fair and agreeable. On the steps of the courthouse, I urged that she fire her solicitor and that we keep the family home, which he was advising we sell. She agreed; her solicitor was shocked.
In the intervening years, we have remained civil and friendly. We share the love and minding of our grandchildren. We spend Christmas Day together, her partner joining in the family celebrations.
We’re civil and grown-up about it… both recognising we once had something special.
Meantime, Ireland, 30 years on, has one of the lowest divorce rates globally, at around nine per 10,000 people.
