CHOICES SHAPE YOUR FUTURE
By Judith Ashton
Looking out of my kitchen window, I can see a slow breeze gently moving the trees. They are slowly and gracefully moving their newly leafed branches like elegant ballerinas in the chorus line. I am slowly sipping my morning coffee and simply being — watching and sipping slowly, savouring the present moment and it seems to last a very long time as I am absorbed in this reverie of presentness.
Taking time to slow down shouldn’t be a luxury, but an essential ingredient of wellbeing. Paul Simon’s “59th Street Bridge Song” drifts into my mind: “Slow down, you move too fast, You got to make the morning last, Just kicking down the cobblestones, Looking for fun and feeling groovy.”
One of my enduring memories of my now adult children’s childhood is when one day they were walking to their dad’s house with their little cousin aged about five. They were early teens and the walk should have taken about 30 minutes. They all arrived about 2 hours later. When asked, “What took you so long lads?”, they reported that the little guy had to go very slowly, not just because of his shorter legs but because of his interest in exploring every little detail on the way. It wasn’t a walk for him but an adventure. Every puddle needed to be stirred by a stick, to be jumped in and splashed in which produced mirth and lots of laughter; every slug had to be scientifically inspected, every butterfly waved at, every dandelion clock had to have its seeds blown in the wind, horse poo had to be trodden on and footprints marvelled at.
The field with horses, sheep and donkeys was the high point of the journey. The donkey, it was reported later, had a very big smile and extremely long teeth, the sheep had dirty bottoms and the horses had very soft eyes and faces.
The child, (to the teenagers’ annoyance) noticed every detail of the walk and for him it was full of magic and awe. For the teens, who were in a hurry to get on with their busy lives, it was quite a waste of time — they could have been playing their video games.
For me, it was a moment in time that has remained fixed in my mind as a great teaching; when we slow down, the world opens its doors for us to experience awe, beauty and important details that in our usual hustle and bustle we simply don’t notice.
For those of you who read my articles, I try not to say anything particularly new or revelatory, but simply to remind you of things that you intuitively know but maybe have simply forgotten. We all have so much inner wisdom and deeply intuitive knowledge about things that are good for us and lead us deeper into our own essential selves; and conversely we all have deep intuitive knowledge of those things that are deleterious to our wellbeing, both physical and mental.
Our busy, bustling world is moving so fast that most people feel they cannot catch up with themselves… they are always chasing their tails with lives which are increasingly full of unfinished tasks, unreachable intentions and unrealistic expectations.
There is only a certain amount of time in a day, in a week, in a month, in a year and in a life. Do we need to be constantly trying to achieve and push ourselves harder? When the bear went over the mountain… what did he see? He saw another mountain! There will always be another mountain. Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to have goals, but we need to work within our individual capacity and energy efficiency. We need to prioritise where we choose to spend time. It is a choice.
Cultivating a practice of appreciating what we have and what we are grateful for, is a powerful tool instead of focussing on what is lacking. Aesop said: “Much wants more!”. Our minds grasp for acquisition… more money, perfect mates… always after “bigger or better”. It’s an endless mirage which ultimately leads to dissatisfaction, missed relationships and frustration.
Time to breathe slowly is what’s ultimately important. Time to slow down and appreciate the finer details in life, time to unplug from all that distracts us from the beauty of the present moment.
Finish reading this, step out into the fresh air, tune into the breeze and the birds. Tune into all the wonder and awe of everything you can see and ultimately into the wonder of your body, your senses and yourself.
