CHOICES SHAPE YOUR FUTURE
By Judith Ashton
I hope that everyone has had a good rest over the holidays. However, I am not foolish enough to think that this is the case for all. For many people Christmas and New Year can be simply exhausting if you’ve been juggling family, work and all that goes on in the home. This time of year, when it’s dark and cold should be a time of rest and recouperation but for many it’s a real challenge especially if you’ve been pushing yourself. Many people are living with chronic tiredness and never get the opportunity to catch up with themselves and festive holidays can simply increase this feeling.
When chronic tiredness is the situation, the person may be dealing with overload at many levels and may result in the subsequent, ‘Burn Out’. This is a term which has been bandied around but what does it really mean? ‘Burn Out’ is not simply temporary stress. It’s a longer and deeper state of prolonged, mental, physical and emotional exhaustion. Some stress is healthy, e.g. Planning a wedding is positive and has an end date. Some stress is unhealthy and seemingly has no end in sight. It feels that life is like a treadmill with no way to stop.
e.g. Caring for a dependent person, raising a family with little support … these issues are challenging enough but add to the mix , today’s hectic pace of life: mobile phones, computers, social media, deadlines, juggling the kids, the relationship, the mortgage, teens, older parents and perhaps menopause as well etc. This constant overload can result in overwhelming feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, constant tiredness, lack of energy, no motivation, feeling trapped, etc which in turn can lead to anxiety, depression, mood swings etc which in turn leads to physical symptoms e.g. sleep disturbance, aches and pains etc. low immunity to colds and generally compromised health.
Sometimes when feeling low we think that the answer might be diet or to start an exercise programme to try to generate some energy… but in my opinion this is not the correct road to go down. When one is really overloaded the answer is complete rest which can allow the whole body to regulate. A short break may be a very short-term solution but it will not raise your energy levels in any significant way. Think of your bank balance… It’s as if the whole body is completely “energy overdrawn” and you are seriously “in the red”. A little break may put a little reserve in your bank but you will quickly spend it and go back into the red.
As the cardiologist I worked for used to say, “It’s like patching someone up and then sending them back into the front line!” and is not a long-term solution and some kind of breakdown becomes inevitable. So, what might be an answer? Are there any support systems out there that can be activated? Sometimes, pride stops us from asking for help, or we see asking for it as a weakness and that we must carry on regardless. Remember, pride comes before a fall!
Maybe we need to communicate better. Do others really know the toll that your current situation is taking on you or are you putting on a brave face? Asking for help is actually a sign of strength rather than weakness. Remember, other people are not mind readers!
Are there things that you can do to be more time efficient and get valuable time for yourself? I find that making daily lists help me stay focussed and saves time. Eliminate things that increase your stress e.g. Listening to bad news and not entertaining things and people who rob your energy. Eat proper good nourishing food, stay well hydrated, go to bed early, get out in the fresh air.
Good habits are important self help tools we can all use; as well of course being aware of your breathing. When stressed, the breathing becomes shallow and more rapid than usual. It’s important to slow it down and deepen it. This can be done anywhere, anytime, anyplace.
If you are really struggling with your energy levels, maybe you need some emotional support e.g. some counselling to help you to express your feelings. Not expressing feelings takes a lot of energy and can increase tiredness. Suppression leads to depression and has a downhill trajectory.
Try to slow down, quite literally, slow down…With some understanding we can always take back a little control. Consciously making changes, however small can start to make a difference.
